We had a strange relationship. She was my coursemate, and from the moment we met on the first day, I knew there was something special about her. She was a diligent student, a group leader, and it felt like she was from a different planet. While the studying process was occasionally fun, it wasn't something I was particularly fond of. I enjoyed attention and would often bother everyone around with my jokes and what I considered to be a refined sense of humor. I would write to her every week, sometimes pretending I had forgotten about the homework, and sometimes I genuinely had.

She had a boyfriend for a while, and I thought they were serious about each other. She would always yell at me, overreact, and send strange messages with multiple question and exclamation marks. However, one day, things took a different turn. We started flirting, sitting closer, and touching each other. Eventually, we even had sex. But it didn't last long. Her boyfriend discovered the truth by going through her phone.

In the end, she chose him, or at least that's how it seemed. I wasn't extremely disappointed because it had been a fun time, but it was a strange feeling. This all happened almost 7 years ago. Recently, we had another chat. I am now married, and she is single. However, the flirting went too far at some point, with phrases like "I'd like to give you a bj, but you have a wife." It's strange to say such things to a friend. So, once again, I find myself unable to maintain a friendship due to a ruined relationship caused by sex.

The same situation happened with K. She was a group leader during my master's degree. Do I have some kind of fixation on this? A few weeks ago, we had another chat, and it seems like I messed up once again. I don't know how to make friends, especially friends that I don't want to f. It's becoming harder every day, actually. The internet doesn't help either, it just makes everything worse. We don't feel the need to go outside anymore. I even work from home, eliminating most social contacts from my life.

Perhaps the people of the future will be very lonely. Maybe AI will replace real friends? Flirting with a language model instead of a real person could be seen as better from an ethical point of view. After all, it wouldn't be considered betrayal if it's not involving a real person, right?